Keeping EVERYBODY Happy

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It’s really quite easy to make a friend: Show someone that you genuinely care about them.

We all have an inherent need to be loved. And most of us enjoy the company of others; some more than others…

Conversely, we rarely do well when we are at odds with someone, especially when it’s someone we interact with regularly. However, it’s impossible to keep everybody happy. More often than we’d like, people get upset. And some of us deal with that better than others.

Surprisingly we sometimes find ourselves doing back flips and cartwheels to keep others happy. Just so they won’t get upset with us…

Those are people pleasers! We love them! They are “Easy going, get along with everybody” type people. To a degree we all need to be people pleasers – in certain relationships. But there is a point where sacrificing who you really are just to please someone else is a bad choice, you become a puppet dancing to other’s music,

When you’re a people pleaser, the people whose music (or moods) you are dancing to, end up tossing you aside when you don’t do what they want. They become accustomed to calling the shots and not being challenged. When a challenge or difference of opinion comes, they are ill equipped to handle the conflict and rather than deal with the problem they rid themselves of what they see is the source of the problem : YOU!

And you’ve lost a friend. Or what you thought was a friend.

We all experience “The fear of man” to some degree. When that fear controls your personality and reactions – and you put aside who you really are, you will eventually be left unhappy.

Realize you are unique. And only you can do what YOU are positioned and talented to do.

Use that unique gifting and talent to influence the world you are in. Deal with matters as they arise to help others- not to spite them. Confrontation should be a positive and kind gesture that a true friend makes towards another friend.

Are you trying to keep everybody happy and sacrificing who God made you to be? Challenge yourself to an honest evaluation……

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4 thoughts on “Keeping EVERYBODY Happy

  1. Char thank you for this timeless and universal entry. It is good to know that someone understands the human dilemma of wanting to keep others happy and loosing yourself, sadly, in the process. I lived my life like that and it was a long, long time before I awakened to the true reality that I had suffocated who I am and who I was born to be. I am in the process of letting God re write my “real me” script. Becoming and discovering the unique and special person He created me to be. May God bless all who read your blog and wake up to the reality that God created us to use our gifts and talents and to waste them because most of our energy is spent being overly concerned with what others think or if they are “happy” all the time.

    • Thanks Monica, I think so many of us think:
      “If I don’t do it someone else will”.
      But I don’t think anyone can do exactly what God planned uniquely for each person to do.

  2. I have worked in the nursing profession for over 25 years and I know first hand what it means to worry about others first then, putting myself second. I did not become conscious of it until after I gave birth to my two children. They helped me to realize the importance of taking care of myself to enable me to be completely present for each of them. As a result, I devote a slot of time each day to read, take a bath, practice yoga or do whatever it takes to rejuvenate!

    • Good for you Cheryl, it took me much longer to understand the importance of valuing my “identity”. Your children will admire the woman you are and recognize your value in the world beyond them. Yay!

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